Match-Day Confidence: Live Workshop
- James Donnelly
- 1 day ago
- 6 min read
Updated: 2 hours ago
Confidence Session – Transcript
Today we’re breaking down what confidence actually looks like in football — and how you can build it with simple habits, behaviours, and better self-talk.
What we’re going to do in this session is finish by thinking about the positive habits we can build that help our confidence on the pitch. We’re also going to look at the actions and behaviours that are linked to confidence and positivity during games.
Finally, we’ll look at how we can rephrase some of the automatic negative things we might say to ourselves when something happens. The goal is to turn those into more positive, constructive thoughts so we start building better habits and, over time, increase confidence.
As we go through the session, we’ll start by analysing people we see as confident. Then we’ll look at behaviours we see in others that aren’t positive and that we want to avoid. We’ll talk through examples and how they apply. Finally, we’ll finish by summarising habits, actions, behaviours, and how to rephrase common negative thoughts.
Thinking about confidence outside football
The first thing I want you to do is not think about football at all.
I want you to think about a friend you have outside of football who you see as confident.
Write “1” on your piece of paper, and then write down why you see them as confident.
What gives you that impression? What habits do they have?
I’ll give you a couple of minutes to write your thoughts down. While you’re doing that, I’ll share an example of my own to give you some ideas.
For me, I’m thinking about a school friend. The characteristics they have are that they’re very loud in social situations, never shy to speak to strangers, always smiling, making eye contact, and generally enjoying social situations. Outside of that, they keep themselves fit and are quite open about their emotions. They always come across as a really confident person.
What’s interesting is that as a friend, I actually know that behind the scenes they aren’t always that confident. They’ve told me that themselves. In many ways, it’s a front they put on. But if you didn’t know that, you’d think they were one of the most confident people in the world.
That’s important, because if someone can act confident and no one knows any different, we can probably take ideas from people like that and apply those characteristics to our own game.
Group discussion – confident friends
One example shared was a friend called Max who is very confident. He talks positively about himself and often says he’s good at things. He does combat sports, has a strong body, and openly says he’s the best at certain things, like video games.
Even if he might not always feel confident inside, he acts confident — and that’s what other people see.
Another example was a friend who isn’t afraid to fail, is open with strangers, tries different sports, smiles a lot, and is friendly to everyone. In that case, confidence may have developed through upbringing or environment, but the behaviours are still clear.
Thinking about confident teammates
Next, we think about an actual teammate you play with.
Write down a teammate who gives you the impression they’re confident. What are they doing that gives you that impression? This can be on or off the pitch.
For example, a confident teammate might be loud on the pitch, never look nervous, show strong body language, look calm and composed, and appear ready to go at all times.
Players shared examples of teammates who:
Are loud with teammates
Aren’t afraid of confrontation or conflict
Step in to protect teammates
Talk confidently to referees
Give instructions and organise others
These players often come across as confident because they aren’t afraid to put themselves forward socially or vocally.
Thinking about confident professional players
Next, think about a famous footballer who you see as confident.
What characteristics do they have? What behaviours give you that impression?
An example is Jude Bellingham. From a young age, he was never scared to speak on camera, even after big matches. He always looked calm and composed. Even when playing at huge clubs as one of the youngest players, he backed himself.
His celebrations also show confidence — standing tall, arms out, taking in the moment. That body language exudes confidence.
Another example is Zlatan Ibrahimović. He wasn’t afraid to try things others wouldn’t, like the overhead kick against England. He was confrontational, protected teammates, spoke his mind, and didn’t care what others thought.
Other players mentioned included:
Lamine Yamal — confident in interviews, relaxed, willing to put pressure on himself
Neymar — not afraid to take players on and keep going
Szoboszlai — calm, persistent, always believing
Cristiano Ronaldo — always backing himself, regardless of age or criticism
A key difference with top players is that they’re willing to put pressure on themselves publicly and then back it up with action.
Master list of confident traits
From friends, teammates, and professional players, we built a master list of confident traits:
Talking positively about yourself
Strong body language
Not being afraid to fail
Communicating clearly
Smiling and being friendly
Giving instructions
Backing yourself and taking risks
Staying calm and composed
Continuing to play your game even when things aren’t going well
Identifying negative behaviours
Next, we looked at negative behaviours that show low confidence.
Examples included:
Throwing arms in the air
Head down, rounded shoulders
Moaning at teammates or referees
Being very quiet
Shying away from challenges
Hiding after mistakes
Blaming others
Making excuses
Reducing effort
Withdrawing from the game
The key point here is that confidence doesn’t usually come from thinking differently first — it comes from acting differently.
Even small changes in posture or behaviour can influence how confident you feel.
Positive actions to use instead
We then created a master list of positive actions and behaviours to use instead:
Strong body language: shoulders back, chest up, head high
Clear communication with teammates
Focusing on the next action after a mistake
Refocusing on personal match goals
Staying calm and composed
Giving full effort at all times
Making eye contact with teammates and coaches
Taking responsibility
Being willing to try things
Blocking out external noise
Smiling and staying relaxed
These actions help rebuild confidence during games.
Reframing negative self-talk
Finally, we looked at negative thoughts players often have, both on and off the pitch.
Examples included:
“People will laugh if I try that again.”
“I’m not good enough to make the squad.”
“This striker is too strong or too fast for me.”
Rather than ignoring these thoughts, the goal is to reframe them into something constructive and actionable.
For example:
Instead of worrying about being laughed at, focus on what you can do better next time and practise it in training.
Instead of worrying about selection, focus on what’s in your control to maximise your chances.
Instead of fearing an opponent, think about how you can limit their strengths and make the game difficult for them.
The most effective reframes are specific and paired with clear actions.
Final takeaway
By the end of this session, you should have:
A list of positive habits to support confidence off the pitch
A list of positive actions to use on the pitch
A way to reframe negative thoughts into constructive ones
Don’t try to apply everything at once. Pick one or two things to focus on in your next training session or match and build from there.
Confidence is a skill — and like any skill, it improves with practice.
James
Matchfit Football
P.S. When you're ready, here's 3 ways I can help:
This confidence session was delivered live inside the Elite Football Athlete Programme.
Alongside the physical training, players regularly take part in live sessions like this that develop confidence, mindset, and decision-making — so what’s learned here actually transfers onto the pitch.
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